Son: Dad, what is the difference between
mother’s tear and wife’s tear?
Father: Mother’s tears hit your heart,
But wife’s tear hit your pocket.
A robber asked a witness beside him;
did u see me robbing this store?
The man answered: well, yehha , but.
the robber kills him instantly.
He then turns to a couple standing close to him and asks the man,
did u see me robbing?
he replies quickly: no i didn’t, but my wife did.
A doctor implanted a new ear to a patient.
Man after the surgery; what you did to me !!! you gave me a woman’s ear!!!!.
Doctor: It makes no difference; both are the same!.
Man: No!! It does, Now i can hear everything but absolutely understand nothing.
Wife: I wish I was a newspaper
so I would be in your hands all day.
Husband: Really! but you probably did not realize
that I am not reading the same newspaper each day!
but a new one everyday.
Wife to Husband: In my dream you were buying
a diamond ring for me!
Husband : yeah I saw
your dad was paying for it
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